Friday, December 27, 2013

"Are You Real?" (Or, Did You Really Just Ask Me That?)

Hello everyone!

Soooo, a couple months ago I posted about how it had been a couple months since I had posted.  And then I proceeded to not post again for a few months, and...well, here we are.  Unfortunately, since my last post, pretty much my only sewing/reenacting/living history achievement has been to finish sewing a tuck in a linen petticoat, which is really boring to look at, even more boring to photograph, and even more boring than that to talk about.  So really, nothing to blog about on that front.

That's not to say I don't have a lot going on, but frankly I don't have a clue as to where I would start, and I'm pretty sure nobody really cares about my personal life anyway.  Historical clothing or GTFO, if you will. :)  So, in lieu of sewing or event content, please accept instead this list of stupid questions that people have asked me during living history work or events in the past.  As a bonus, please also find my internal monologue in italics.  I'm sure some of you can relate all too well!

  • Are you hot in that?
    Yes.  I'm f*#$ing roasting.  It's 110 degrees Fahrenheit in the shade with about 4,000% humidity and you could poach an egg in my cleavage.  What the hell kind of question is that?
  • Are you real?
    No.  You are hallucinating.  Seek professional help.
  • Do you wish you lived back then?
    I enjoy things like having flush toilets, readily available medical care, and the right to vote and own property.  I currently work out of the home at a job I love which does not involve nursing or teaching, I keep an apartment of my own, and I met my fiance because of the internet.  Pretty sure as a woman at any other time in history, my life would have sucked.  Yes, including the early to mid 20th century.
  • Isn't wearing a corset uncomfortable?
    What, and wearing a bra is a walk in the park?  You try having tits as big as your head hanging on two bits of dental floss that dig into your shoulders all day.  I'd much rather wear the custom-fitted and hand-constructed corset that also offers excellent back support and promotes good posture.
  • Is that a real fire?
    Come stick your head in it and find out.
No doubt we've all had our fair share of poorly considered questions while interacting with the public...what's your favorite crazy question?


  1. "Did you know there's a rat on your shoulder?"


  2. How do you go to the bathroom?
    Hmmm...biologically speaking, it's a complex process...

  3. "Can I touch your butt?"
    Sure thing - and and I'm sure you don't mind me touching yours in return!

  4. "Is that a real baby?" Happened to us last summer.

    And oh, do I agree about stays/corsets vs bra's!

    1. A friend of mine used to have her baby in a lovely period cradle at demos. Every. Single. Demo. "Is that a real baby?" Considering that this was twenty years ago, one can't even blame advances in animatronics for this. 0_o

  5. "What's underneath?" (as they proceed to hike up your skirts uninvited).

    If they don't stop soon, they are going to get an eyeful of my historically accurate undergarments and they bits they don't really cover well.